Commonwealth Credit Card Ad

It has been brought to my attention that this particular mail-advertising I’ve received this morning is hilarious and very attention grabbing.

It is an ad for the Commonwealth Mastercard (aka Credit card and chi chingggg!). Just when you need it at that time of the year where you are to be spending hellaaa lotsa of money within 4 months.

Anyway,

There are 5 instances of ‘worst case scenarios’ and possible ‘answers/actions’ to take on. Each of them contains a witty twist in it where at the end, it’ll tell you that a credit card will come handy. 2 Favorite ones are “A guide to Dining Out” and  ”Concert Party Guide”. and here they go

A guide to dining out

Table etiquette
Use the amount of cutlery and plates on the table as a measure of how formal you need to be. if there’s more cutlery than you know what to do with, you could be out of your league. Take your cue from other tables. 

Choosing the wine
Wine is an intergral part of the dining experience. There are many to choose from, so steer yourself in the right direction by remembering: In a cask; bad. In a bottle; good. In a bottle produced from a region you can’t pronounce; even better.

Dinner Talk
All topics are open to conversation except politics and religion. However; they can be used in an emergency when the long silences are becoming more awkward than the topics themselves. 

Helpful hint
for extra brownie points after the meal, slip your Commowealth Bank Low Fee Credit Card on top of the bill and say “It’s my treat”.

—-HAHAHA sayyyy what?!?! Here comes the second one.

Concert Party Guide

What to wear:
Black should be your color of choice. It is versatile, fitting into all musical genres. Dressing in black may have you confused as a roadie, but do not object. Simply enjoy the free backstage access (lol).

Busting a move:
Step 1. Tilt head forward
Step 2. Tilt head  back.
The ‘head-bang’ has been completed. Vary intensity to suit music.

The drinks queue:
ick a bartender for the night. Be courteous, smile and tip sufficiently. An amicable relationship will form between the two of you and service should become quick and efficient. If the opposite begins to occur you may be coming across as a stalker

Enjoy the evening and bring a tall friend to take photos ;) (helll yahhh i’m the tall friend!)

Helpful Hint:
A Commonwealth Bank Low Fee Credit Card allows you to purchase concert tickets online so you can skip the ticket like slumber party.

—— I’m guessing the last line is a bit of a stretch. Maybe the writers have run out of ideas. But good enough for me cause I’ve read all 5 scenarios and I’m actually thinking of getting a credit card. HAHAHA ya know it aint that easy. But I’ll keep that in mind. =D